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But if we continue today and tomorrow, that optiondies away and you're committed. You'll be a sissy and probably lose somefriends. People will laugh behind your back. Are you OK with that?"Edith asked."Are you?" I asked."You said that you really started wanting to be feminine when you were10 or 11. Have you felt that way ever since?" asked Ivy."Pretty much." All those years of hiding that part of yourself must have been prettytough on you. I can see hiding it from me. We work together. But it musthave been painful to hid these feelings from Edith."Edith, who had been staring out a window, turned around. I could see atear on her cheek."Yesterday was an experiment," said Edith. "All your life, you've fearedwhat would happen if people knew your secret, right? You were afraid ofwhat people would say if they saw you wearing makeup or dresses or nailpolish." Of course." Yet, yesterday, you got outed, as it were, to Lisa, to Liz and a wholesalon full of cackling women, and to Peeper. And we. I had no intention of leaving Joey and Suzi so abruptly like that. But she couldn’t know that for sure, and she agreed to see me for ten minutes after she finished with what she was doing.In retrospect, I imagine she could have seen me immediately, but she too knew how to use other people’s feelings against them. I wasn’t prepared to have to face Joey as I waited in the same conference room I had that morning.After slamming the door closed, Joey snarled, “What the fuck are you doing?”There wasn’t any point in trying to mislead him or to withhold anything from him, so I simply said in as calm of a voice as I could, “I know about the attacks, Joey. I’m here to tell Sarah I understand what she’s doing and why, and that I’ll try my best not to interfere.”“And you couldn’t have waited until tonight to simply tell me so I could tell her without having manipulate her into seeing you?”“I need to talk to her, Joey, in person.”“About what?” he said hotly, my empathic abilities picking up on.
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