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I didn't want to rush you, but ... I didn't want to rush myself, either." What is it about me or our relationship that you are uncertain about?" You and I are looking for the same thing, Marion. We're looking for a partner for life. I'm being careful because I thought I had found that person before and it didn't turn out to be her after all. I was just at the stage when I was going to ask her to marry me when I discovered her secret, a secret that changed everything between us. I thought I knew her and I was wrong. It was only a fluke that I found out. Only a fluke!" Bill was looking directly at Marion as he told her of his broken dreams with Zena. She would never know her name or the nature of her secret, but she would know that he valued honesty and trust above all other things in a marriage."I can understand that, Bill. But sex is about two people getting to know each other in the most intimate way. I find you very desirable and I hope you find me desirable too. I want to make. It's a little late to put the genie back in the bottle and I was just thinking about that when you came in. I'm not even sure that I want to."Jill got up and came over and gave me a hug. "I don't blame you, and I am certainly not judging you. God knows that if I were in your shoes, I would have done the exact same thing. Hey, it's just mutual masturbation. And it's over the phone, so there is a certain kind of wall there. I say enjoy. Maybe someday I can work up the courage to do the same."I could feel tears well up in my eyes. "Thanks Jill," I said, holding her close. "You always know what to say to make me feel better."With that, I resolved to enjoy my new found sexual outlet. I refused to let any guilt overtake me. It was cathartic to be able to accept this new found sexuality and I couldn't wait for Matt to call again.Somehow, I got through the rest of the week without driving myself crazy!On Saturday Jill came over and we lay out by the pool for a while, then came in and made.
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