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How many times now had I jerked off in a drunken stupor? Sometimes falling asleep right on the edge of the bed, awakening to find my hand still on my dick, telling me the mission had failed. I promptly took the problem in hand and finished the task.If I was to retain any of the sanity I hoped I still had left, and stop the dick soreness, I knew I had to do something. And quickly, before I drank myself into oblivion, and the death I knew was sure to follow.But for now, I needed a little drink.I went into the kitchen and got chipped ice from the icemaker. Then hurried back into the living room, carrying the frozen ice in cupped hands.I went over to the liquor cabinet, sloppily dumped the ice into a glass, and fixed myself a stiff Scotch and water. I took a sip and looked over at the closed front door, as if it might offer up an answer to my plight. I stared at, willing it to speak to me, to tell me what I must do, how to go about saving myself, but the dumb door kept acting as if it. "No, none whatsoever. In fact we..." I stopped talking as in remembered something I'd almost forgotten."You what?" Helen prompted."We made love on that Friday morning and, and when we, er, finished. She said that she loved me. I've just realised she said something that I didn't quite hear. You know, I'm thinking now, that she must have said 'forgive me!' I told you, she said some funny things in the height of passion. Not the sort of things that women usually say." What kind of things?" her interest obviously piqued."I'm not sure but she always seemed to be asking me to love her, not to make love to her." And did you? Love her, I mean?" Well, I wouldn't be here now if I didn't, would I?" I don't know Peter. You married a woman who you knew almost nothing about, that you'd met only a few months previous. Then, less than two years later, she walks out on you. Do you really love her, or are you just angry that she's gone?" I'm damned angry that she's gone, but to tell you the truth I.
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