Me & Wife

It is nice to smell her horrid feet? Has Jaina Proudmoore gone insane?“I mean ... What with all those Orcs and Trolls and Goblins and what-have-you that you have to accompany yourself with ... They smell bad enough as they are, from a distance. I shudder to imagine the stink coming from the foot of one of those greenskin barbarians!”Anger rose in Caevinni. Hadn’t Jaina once been a good friend to exactly one of those people? To hear her talk like this sent a terrible feeling crawling across the elf’s skin. Besides, even though she wasn’t wrong about the smell of some Horde ladies feet – Troll women were the worst by far and they never even wore shoes! - the feet of Jaina Proudmoore were something else, still.It was not just that it was an especially exotic smell; by the light, it was unpleasant, but it was just the good old, cheesy and salty reek of sweaty, stinky, unwashed feet, but the sheer force and thickness of it made Jaina’s personal foot-scent so powerful and. .” she trailed off, looking around.“Look,” I said. “Remember what I was saying about rules? Well, there are rules for living in this neighborhood, too. If you abide by the rules, if you show people that they can rely on you, they’ll accept you, and give you the benefit of the doubt. If you don’t, well, today’s the 31st, and I don’t think you can expect too many children to be ringing your doorbell this evening.”“Fine. We’ll save on candy.” She flicked her cigarette. I remembered how, since we’d moved here, she’d enjoyed greeting the trick-or-treaters at the door, oohing and ahhing over their costumes.“When did you start smoking?” I asked.“What do you care?”“You’re right,” I said. “It’s none of my business.” I turned around and went inside.My conversation with STB had reminded me both that I needed to get some candy, and that I could use some help doling it out. I get along just fine with teenagers, but, although I like small children (and would like some of my own, someday), I never.
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