Flanna the writer of this turgid mush made me blush, often, in the privacy of my own apartment for goodness sake and I was forced to wrestle with raging hard-ons. But it was worth it – I made notes, particularly about positions which she seemed to favor in bed or over stone walls bounding fields in fog-swept southern Ireland overlooking Kilkern Lake. This girl, prepared to be screwed on hard stone amid fog without fear of the Little People watching impressed me no end. For a few hours that weekend I lost reason and fancied Flanna Maureen O’Connor was the world’s greatest writer – er, female writer. I returned to work on Monday wondering where the weekend had gone and cursed when finding my darling was not coming in that day – she’d gone to Boston for a tea party, a dinner that evening actually where she would be picking up some sort of marketing management award. I pined for my Flanna all day and spent that night in a bar drinking beer, pretending I was drinking Irish whisky to. ’ ‘ . . . And they don’t mind your little problem?’ asked Sue. ‘… No.’ ‘I see. I’m glad to hear that you have some sort of social outlet. And I’m really glad that we can be here for you this summer while things are mostly closed at the university!’ ‘Thank you.’ Matt felt sort of discouraged. He always wore diapers to classes, but he never thought anybody knew. And the odd time somebody suspected something, heard something crinkle, or saw the odd bulge, nobody ever paid any attention. As far as he was concerned, nobody even knew. Funny that Sue and Laurie were making a big deal of it. Laurie finally took her turn. ‘Do you have a doctor here in the city where you attend university, other than your f****y doctor?’ ‘No.’ ‘Well we know of a doctor who treats many of our residents here, who also works part-time at the university, as a psychiatrist, helping out the student clinic. She deals with all sorts of problems. Why don’t we schedule an appointment with her after lunch?’ ‘I guess.’ All.
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