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?Thirty-nine.?Marie ignored my distress; actually, she didn’t ignore it, she revelled in it. Her body also shone with sweat as the thrill and effort of whipping my naked body in its most tender and sensitive place excited her more and more. As I watched, a single drop of her sweat fell from her nipple and trickled down her thigh; it’s shining trail on her leg a testament to her lust for me. Believe me, we love each other, and it is my pleasure to serve her in any and every way possible, but whilst she never loses control of herself whilst she is torturing me, she really, really enjoys doing these things to me.?Thirty-eight.?Another stroke of the belt deep inside my cunt cut through my thoughts. Of course I love the orgasms I achieve through the unrelenting pain that Marie’s love demands of me, but when it’s actually going on, there are times when it just hurts. I am often in too much pain to even consider how much it degrades me, but I do sometimes wonder, what kind of rational,. After assuring him I could handle it, he agreed. (It was the kind of “being made to dance like a puppet” that I get now why he hasn’t done it to anyone since.)It wasn’t a happy time. Happiness essentially came in 50-minute bursts, when Chad was out drinking or showing off his Fast & Furious-mobile, and I was able to catch an episode of Star Trek without having to hear about “that stupid nerd stuff” I like.People who have jobs that involve a lot of stress and putting themselves outside their comfort zones do a thing called compartmentalization; essentially becoming a different person to handle those situations. It’s how a lawyer can defend a Charles Manson or Leonard Whyte, or a hospice nurse can watch four families lose Gramma in one shift, and neither of them go home and blow their heads off at the end of the day. Between the diner and Chad, I had started taking it to an unhealthy level. I wasn’t allowed to be me, I didn’t go by Susan then. I went by one of the three names Chad.
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