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”“That ... is an amazing and likely wilful misunderstanding of the purpose of counselling. Peter is just the same. He comes back from having killed more mobsters than béchamel sauce, shaking like a leaf, and claims he’ll be fine after a few rounds of squash and a twenty year old German art student.”“Wait, what? He plays squash with a German art student?”“No, he plays squash with his driver and he has exhaustive sex with a German art student.”“Oh. Doesn’t sound very appealing. I mean, I hate squash.”She didn’t even laugh, even though I find the notion of me doing anything even remotely homosexual very comical. It’s like Prince Charles suddenly taking up Krav Maga.“Pa-dum,” she said, pretending a tired drum-roll followed my joke. “Anyway, that’s not something we need to go into right now. Martin, if you like I’m available to you. I’m not sure if I’d be taking advantage of you, so I’ll come right out with it: if you need to wind down by having sex, I’m all for it. But please, not just on. “You probably didn’t notice. Lots of girls have tattoos these days.”“I still think her skirts are too short,” I added.“She’s got beautiful legs,” Sharon continued. “She should show them off while she’s still young.”“Well, her makeup is overdone,” I declared, hoping to win a point.“It’s just a look, John,” Sharon replied. “She’ll grow out of it.”“Her friends are strange,” I threw in, running out of ideas. “Especially that Joe guy.”“He’s a budding poet,” Sharon said, throwing her arms in the air comically. “They’re supposed to be strange!”And so it went on until I had exhausted all my arguments. It didn’t seem to matter what I thought, Sharon always had an answer. We’d discussed the matter many times before, the argument invariably ending with me having to admit that Jamie made good grades at school, didn’t smoke, didn’t do drugs, and didn’t even drink too much. Apart from being a slut, Jamie was perfect, at least according to her mother, but I knew differently. I saw the way she eyed.
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