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I was going to school in Arkansas, and Tim was in school in Louisiana. ‘When I got back to school, my roommate had transferred so I ended up with someone else. Her name was Fran and we bonded really well. She had never had a boyfriend before so she hung on my every word as I told her about Tim.’ Patrice paused, as if unsure whether to talk about the next part. ‘Go on, you can tell me about it,’ Benjamin prompted. Patrice looked at the door, to reassure herself it was locked. ‘She wanted to hear about everything, even the sexual parts,’ Patrice said, blushing a little. ‘We decided that it would be innocent enough if we didn’t use names. She wouldn’t know who he really was that way, so I told her everything. I can’t believe how intimate the details were, but it was strangely satisfying to be able to share that with someone. Without using his name, it was anonymous somehow. We just referred to Tim as him. After a few weeks, Fran knew Tim almost as well as I did. I got letters from Tim. When he entered the bedroom, breathless, he found her lying happily in bed while still in her pyjamas, reading a book. Hearing his heavy breathing she looked at him, smiled, and asked how his day had been. The surprised man was completely confused and asked his wife “What happened here today?” The woman smiled at him and replied “You know how every day when you come home you ask me what the hell I did that day?” “Yes” replied the man, astonished. “Exactly” replied the woman “Today, I didn’t do any of it”.REVENGE #6: A newly married couple moved into their new home. The next day, the woman asked her husband “Darling, one of the pipes in the bathroom is leaking, could you please fix it?” The husband looked at his wife and said “What do I look like to you, Bob the Builder?” A few days later, the woman asked another favour from her husband “Honey, my car isn’t starting, can you drive me to the grocery store?” The husband looked at his wife and said “What do I look like to you, an Uber.
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