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"I don't even know WHY I'm so emotional, Imean, I'm the one who dumped him, not the other way round..." It's only natural to be emotional," Ophelia says softly. "You had highexpectations, and they haven't been reached." Yeah, this is more 'heartbroken' than 'disappointed'," I sigh. "God...I've broken up with guys before, why is this one so different? I mean,we worked out that Simon wasn't 'Prince Charming', right?" And yet, for six months, you believed that he might be," Ophelia says."And let's not forget that while you may still possess some male...'Particulars', you are chemically female, with all the side effectsthat that brings." Hey, don't blame oestrogen for this," I say. "It's easily the bestthing that's happened to me in the last two years. Well, that andcoming to uni. And meeting Katie, Lauren and the girls. And the Angels.Okay, so things have been going pretty great for me in the grand schemeof things, this Simon thing is, like, a 'speed bump', I'll find someoneelse soon. Sometimes you'll get it on stage butmost nights customers will pay to do you in the back room. You'll alsobe providing oral services to guys and gals. From Bat Cape to Bat Babeto Bat Slut. Just think of all the good times you have to look forwardto." Oh no," the Masked Mincer groaned. "You can't leave me in thiscondition." Sure I can. Wouldn't want you getting any silly ideas about returningto your old career. No, I like you much better this way. With tits soovergrown and a bum so ginormous that there's no way you can ever goafter the criminal element again, and a reduced IQ that makes crimesolving impossible. Best of all, your sex drive will make it impossiblefor you to go more than about a half hour without all your attentiongoing to having your prostate milked. Of course, if we only allow itonce a day, you'll spend the other 23 hours plus obsessing over it. Allyour attention will be on that ridiculous dick, so small it wouldn't evenregister on a Peter Meter. Fun, fun,.
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