I Want This Girl Now
Not the dumb blondes from two doors south but the guys who moved in on the other side of us. The first party ran most of Labor Day weekend. We ignored them as much as we could, but when we went out to orientation Tuesday, there were beer cans in our yard and vomit on the sidewalk. The girls were royally pissed off and were going to start picking up the cans and throwing them back in the assholes’ yard.“Hey, wait,” I said. “Don’t touch any of their garbage without gloves. I hate to say it, but they could have all kinds of crap in there. Maybe even needles, condoms, and body parts.”“But they trashed our yard!” Jas screamed. “They can’t do that!”“And the sidewalk,” Ariel agreed. “Gross!”“I’ll pull the hose around and wash the sidewalk,” I said. “When we get back this afternoon I’ll go have a talk with them. I doubt anyone is awake or sober this morning.”I sprayed down the sidewalk and managed to not get any of their shit on me. We walked down the middle of the street anyway to the next. They can have the slut and besides I am in the hospital. I am getting even, even if it kills me. What I had planned just might. I sat in the hospital for the next week plotting and planning.I got out of the hospital and went to the bank. I took out 500.00 and while I was there the teller let me know that my wife had been trying take out money. She got pissed when she found out that her name wasn't on any of my accounts. Then she came back with her lawyer and was told that even with a lawyer her name wasn't on any of the accounts. They left pissed. I headed right to my brother and asked if he knew a good lawyer. He was pissed at me and asked how I could have our friends arrested. As I turn to leave, he ran out and stopped me."Hank what in the fuck is going on?) asked my brother.For the next hour I explained to him and his wife all that had happened. They sat there with their eyes bugged and mouths wide open. When I finished his wife looked at me and called me a liar. My brother told.
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