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Picking up the phone I asked for a cab out to Hazelwood cemetery, The operator gave a sort of a laugh and told me someone would be there soon.After a short wait a taxi pulled up and asked if I was the fare to the cemetery? I said I was and got in. The driver was a youngish looking redheaded lady. We took off and she was heading in a different direction to what I wanted to go."Uh, the Hazelwood cemetery is in the other direction miss." You're kidding me aren't you?" No, I want to go to the CRB camp next to the cemetery."She started to laugh, "Usually if someone wants jiggy jig they ask for somewhere unusual. You sure you don't want some?" Uh, no thank you, I have a girlfriend and don't want to cheat on her." You'll soon grow out of that silly notion son, anyhow we better get you home. If you change your mind just give Scarlet a ring."When we reached the camp she gave me a couple of business cards, "Give them to the boys, maybe they might be interested."The following morning I. “What was I supposed to say? That she was a gross pig and we won’t help?” I really didn’t understand what Lindsay expected.My big sister looked at me like I was an even bigger dummy then she thought. “No, you should have said you’d be happy to walk her fat ass back to the toilet and time her. You can check the toilet to see how many turds and take a picture and text him for all I care. I told you to be ruthless. Your idea of being ruthless is to tell Dad you’d be glad to help?” she asked.“I am not ruthless,” I shrugged to my sister.“No duh,” Lindsay put her hands on her hips and glared at me like I was a disappointment. “I want you to pretend you are. You don’t have to do it forever. You can be subtle around Dad but when he turns his back pinch her butt or goose her. Tell her to show you the butt plug and then pull it out and let it drop on the ground but tell her it was her fault,” she said.“That sounds like something you would do,” I observed.“Exactly,” Lindsay told me to be more.
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