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Through OkCupid, I met a woman named Lauren (twenty-seven, I think), who I exchanged messages with and eventually started talking with on the phone. She wanted to talk with me before our first date to make sure I was legitimate. As I walked to meet her at a cafe in Chicago on our first date, she sent me a text with a picture of what she looked like. In the picture, she wore a tank top and short shorts that accentuated her thighs. I sensed that she felt horny and desperate, kind of like myself. At the same time, I wondered if she was a serial killer. I decided to see what happened.We met and she seemed normal. Looked like her pictures, had a tattoo on one arm, made good conversation. She asked me at one point if I wanted to come back to her apartment to hang out. I at first told her I would have to think about it and that I didn't usually get asked that on a first date. She was apologetic and said she totally understood if I didn't want to.If you are wondering if I was simply playing. Red faced, Steve scowled and muttered curses under his breath, just clearly enough that Mike and Marie could hear him predicting they'd all be shot full of holes at the next encounter, left to rot in the hot desert sun for the buzzards to pick apart. "White bleached bones scattered in the lava rock," Steve muttered to himself.He glanced up, chagrined at his own outburst. He blushed a deeper red when he noticed Mike and Marie smiling back at him."It's a conundrum, ain't it?" Mike grinned."Damn right it is!" Steve snapped back. He looked to Marie: "Do you have any words of wisdom, young lady?" Don't be a target," she grinned back at him."Hmmmph!" Steve snorted. He forced himself to calm down; to think more clearly. No weapons and don't be a target are pretty much two sides of the same coin."Well, hell, that's it!" he exclaimed. "Pass that blasted coffee pot, will you? Jeezus, you guys, I'm going nuts trying to figure how we're going to stay alive another day without our weapons, and.
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