Jen had a sizeable list of must-haves for her wedding. I knew I would never get everything on her list. I decided to make my own list. It wouldn’t be me just rattling off a bunch of things I wanted. I would make a written list. I decided to try to start with the most important items at the top of the list. 1. At the end of the ceremony I had to be married to Jeff. 2. The ceremony must include a rabbi and a chuppah. 3. All of Jeff’s family must be there. 4. My closest friends must be there. That was Jen and Rich so far, if she is still seeing him. I swapped two and three and then swapped three and four. As I added to the list none of the new items seemed make-or-break. 5. Attire must be dress-up. 6. Artist for drawings 7. Photos for guests 8. Flowers 9. Music 10. Dancing — how will they accommodate twelve hundred guests? 11. Theme for the wedding 12. Entertainment for guests during hors d’oeuvres, pictures, whatever Each item became more difficult to add. The order wasn’t clear. As I. While on the way I worked on what I would say and what I would do. I had decided that while Dark Angel was fine enough, I felt somewhat embarrassed that she had been my first. Maybe this mature lady would take pity on me if I claimed to still be a virgin, maybe she would show me the ropes and make me a real man.So, when I finally reached her door, I knew what I would say. However, I was slightly thrown once again when I got there. The lady who greeted me was clearly older than I had expected and showed a lot of mileage on her face. Look, she wasn’t truly ugly, but the shock of the discrepancy between expectation and reality was enough to derail my severe horniness for a moment.Well, I was here. I had driven relatively far to get there, and I didn’t really want to go to the effort of walking out and finding someone else. I was going to get laid, and this was right in front of me. What’s the worst that could happen?She showed me in and took me to the bedroom, where the bed was made,.
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