This wait is killing me, I have to know if he is finally he one. I want to get up and pace back n forth but he told me what to do. I am to get undress and sit on the edge of the bed, legs closed, hands by my side and head high, eyes forward. Fuck what s taking him so long, my stomach is tightening so bad I'm starting to feel sick.Mind wandering I failed to hear the lil click as the door opens and I jump, lil squeak rushes from my lips. I close my eyes, scared too see him, scared too see his face, too see disappointment, thinking I am not what he want. What if I don't fit his image, all these negative thoughts rip their way ino my brain, shredding my confidence. Just when I feel like crying a hard slap saves me, bringing me back to reality. "I said eyes open and forward didn't I Sleave?" his voice washes over me, drowning out those thoughts and I find myself straightening, shoulders back, head high, eyes forward. "That's my Princess.". I can't help but glow at his praise. Feel his. He turned the lights on in the dining room. He sat in the dark living room.He turned on the television to watch while waiting for them to arrive. He turned to the local channel to see what was happening in the area. He was shocked when he heard his eulogy being read on the air as a public message from the news station. They had found a man with a deep resonant voice that gave the message a stateliness that he could never achieve. He wondered how it would be received.There was a knock on the door. Surprised that they would knock John stood up and let them into the house. He turned off the television. Liz asked, “What do we do now?”John held his hands out with his palms up. “Well, you can go in the dining room. What you do in there, I may or may not see depending on whether I’m here or in my bedroom.”Herb looked nervous and said, “I’m not really sure that I can perform with a possible audience.”John put a hand on his shoulder as he said, “There’s only one person you have to concern.
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