And David was being invited on vacation. Seeing as he was the only male to be included in a sea of ‘once wounded, twice shy’ defensive estrogen, he was sure to be under particularly close scrutiny all weekend. For David, the invitation amounted to a final casting call, he was being allowed to audition for the director, my grandmother. To his credit, he recognized the perils of his situation, and had already come to me for pointers on impressing the grams. You have to respect a person who understands the daunting nature of a task and still has the temerity to attempt it. If he could just survive this weekend, he would be home free. Once accepted into my family, I believe that assassination of a talk show host is the only offense for which you can be expelled, though the rest of the family refuses to confirm this rumor. We seemed to be prepared for our trip to the City of Neon. My grandmother, who lives in Northern California, was flying into McCarran International, and would meet us. 5. then sit back and watch them look for number 4.There are times when keeping my mouth shut is my greatest achievement.No matter how big the hammer you cannot beat common sense in to stupid people.Notice from the state of MontanaTo all hikers and campers using this forest, BE WARNED that this area has a large number of bears, both black and grizzly. Due to the frequency of bear encounters, you should wear bells on you clothing or walking stick to warn bears of your coming. Your should also carry pepper spray to use if you are attacked.You should be alert to bear activity and be able to Tell the difference between Black Bears and Grizzly Bear feces. Black Bear feces will have berries in it and may contain rodent fur. Grizzly Bears has little bells in it and smells like peppers.Phyllis Dillerisms...Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age. As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.Phyllis DillerHousework can't kill you, but why take a chance?Phyllis DillerCleaning house.
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