I tell him that I understand and agree that I need to be punished more. I can’t ever admit how much I am turned on right now. It’s not the pain so much, it’s the dominance. He bent me back over that bed again and told me I need to count down each strike, one at time. There were to be 15 of them, and he would stop in between each one, so I could think about the next one. I begged for mercy after each one, but he did not give in. He told me if he showed weakness just once, I would lose some respect and he would lose some control, neither of which he was willing to give up. In the back of my mind, I knew he was right, but I didn’t think I could stand one more and I still had five left. Five, four, three, two, one…. Finally it was over. It hurt so good, yet stung so bad, I knew I would never make that mistake again. He dropped the belt on the floor, wiped away my tears, and kissed me ever so passionately. Then he brought me to my knees. He unzipped his pants and pulled out his hard,. .I can tell you how it feelsin multitudes of waysTo not wanna be realto want to fade awayI can show you howmy inner being drownedFrom being in this townfrom staying on the groundEveryones an alpha dogalways looking down Never eat the scrapsjust leave them on the groundI often danced to soundslike no one was aroundTo noise they couldn't heartill no one was around..My mind keeps forgettinghow to breathe rightFor while others air goIn and outout and inIn a simple function of normalityMine falters a lot of the timeTurns my voice into wheezing gaspsThe dead could speak better than IMy lungs squish into a tiny boxIn the center of my chestCausing a volcanic eruption of painIt is a very similar feeling to my heartWhich thumps and clamorsAt a speed unknown to humanityThe pace of a jackrabbit heartwhose cotton little tail's on fireUntil it simply feels like itFrozen insidesBrown eyes mixed with sadEmpty heartFast mindEmotions running fastSensitive soulBlank stareDepression all aroundTear.
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