I instinctually acted and carried myself as a lady, to the raves of mycompanions. Like I had been born a girl...but I'd always been with girls soit seemed natural. The Avon Lady had given me a bunch of samples to keep andthey were put to good use. Pam continued to help me by letting me wear herclothes, coaching me in the art of being a lady, and instructing me withmakeup tips whenever I wanted to dress up and it became frequent till I gotaccomplished with the makeup application. By the time of our senior year, Ihad begun to acquire some of my own women's clothes which she allowed me tokeep at her house, mainly underwear e.g. panties, slips,bras and hosiery. Thegirls in our group loved to see me cross dressed and insisted that I dress upat every opportunity which I did just about every time we went out together.They gave me lots of advice and instruction and I was a quick study, beinghighly motivated. I enjoyed being with them as a girl and they treated meaccordingly. It was great. Whom am I trying to fool? I crawl under my blankets and think of you again. I think what it would be like to have you here beside me. How it would be to feel the warmth of your body next to me and how it would be to have you reach for me and pull me into your arms. I turn to my side, almost prepared to see you lying there… but all that is there is an empty space, as empty as the feeling I experience having a lover whom Ive never seen nor actually spoken to. I close my eyes and make myself go to sleep only to dream of you once again. ****** Oh, yes. I dream of you just as I fantasize about you, but with more passion than my conscious mind would ever allow. In my dreams, my room is much more elegant than the plain bare walls that it has in the real world. It is no longer the room of a lonely, tired woman, but is now the boudoir of a sensual, desirable lover. In my dreams, you come to me, take me in your arms and kiss me deeply and passionately until I swoon. When my knees give out.
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