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You made a promise, which you’ve no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it’s my bloody fault!”Compliments of a shy reader... A Man and his wife are dining at a table in a plush restaurant, and the husband keeps staring at a drunken lady swigging her gin as she sits alone at a nearby table.The wife asks, “Do you know her?”“Yes,” sighs the husband. “She’s my ex-wife. She took to drinking right after we divorced seven years ago, and I hear she hasn’t been sober since.”“My goodness!” says the wife. “Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?”An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice picnic tables, Horseshoe courts, and some orange and grapefruit trees.The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built.One evening the old farmer decided to go down. Mrs Garner opened the door to her Study and Abbigail walked in. The School Secretary was in the outer office but had no idea what was going to happen either. It was going to be her break anyway and she would be going to the staffroom any moment. Jack followed Mrs Garner and Abbigail in to the Study and remained silent. He knew he had been wrong to have had a go at Lucy the way he did and supposed that he was going to suffer because of it. “Do you have a box of tissues please, Mrs Garner?” Abbigail asked. Mrs Garner took an opened box out of her desk drawer and handed it to Abbigail. She knew what was going to happen next. Abbigail held the box out to Jack and ordered, “Take your trousers and underpants off and jerk off in to a tissue, Jack. Be quick about it as we have to get back to class in twenty minutes and you need the cane first.” Jack grimaced as he glanced at Mrs Garner who showed no signs of offering to leave the Study even whilst he emptied himself. So Jack had no choice as.
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